I can't help feeling paranoid. Everything is working out for me lately and I am known to be the most unlucky Irish girl in existence. I dunno, maybe it's just my perspective that's changed. Glass half full, riiiiiight? School: good. Job: good. Friends: good. Romance: good. Family: good.
This post is an attempt to divert my attention from this bogus paper assignment. This weekend was delicious per usual but my body is kind of angry that the drinking to exercise ratio is not in its proper balance.
You know when you're a little kid you don't like a lot of things? Well, I mean, I guess I've never been too picky about stuff like how little kids can be. But there are still things that just don't interest you. I didn't care for fish or movies with dark haired men typically because they seemed dull. Now all I can do is consume things like fish, mushrooms and lots of caffeinated substances and be enthralled by dopey movies like Vegas Vacation (which has been on the big TV all day ohmygod and I have seen it so many times because each time my mom will say 'this is not Las Vegas it is hot there you kids would have down syndrome if we raised you there' which doesn't make sense on so many different levels but she makes me watch it with her everytime).
I feel weird about a lot of things. Like, transitioning. I'm comfortable where I am but I can see how things will be shaping out the next few months and time really freaks me out. I'm bad with deadlines, dates and aging. I don't like change but I hate repetition. I don't know! I don't know! I don't know! Gina what I am trying to say is I hate how things are uncertain, and I can't stand how things change daily, and quickly. I wish I was still sixteen because that was the best and working at LCG makes me want it even more because there's a huge flock of girls that are like really into gossip and school dances and I wish I could be but now I'm boring and just freak out about stupid things like car payments and getting downtown on time and wearing clothes that are "professional" enough and not failing out of community college, que lastima!
I want to take the money in my account and send myself to Ireland/Spain and move upstairs over a pub and work there during the day then stumble around the streets at night and do other fanciful things equated with Europe that I daydream about and generalize until they sound plausible enough. Soon, hopefully. I suppose the problem is I am overwhelmed and unimpressed with my surroundings lately but I've never been so busy. Therefore, I should really get on that Anthro paper while I have time now to do it.
I sound ridiculous. I am eighteen and things are working out so well, I just get nostalgic sometimes and end up being sappy/silly/confused!
to-do today:
1. Anthro paper gogogo! 2. Play catch up with Bio reading! 3. Submit to the posting for dance class! 4. Work out! 5. Go see jazz concert! 6. Hydrate and feel less hungover! 7.Buy tickets to see Cursive perhaps! 8. Call Wes and tell him if he schedules me for Thursdays anymore I will have to fight him, street rules only! 9. Convince myself that going to Tijauana with the navy bros is really a good idea and not that scary at all, yeah..
Last night I held a ten minute conversation with a dog in Spanish. I am really starting to like animals, maybe I am becoming less of a bitch, but most likely not. Adios Amigo.
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